At New Yorkâ€™s Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, US Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of mathâ€™s instruction.
„Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,“? Gonzales said. „They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like â€˜xâ€™ and â€˜yâ€™ and refer to themselves as â€˜unknownsâ€™, but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, â€˜there are 3 sides to every triangleâ€™.“?
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, „If God had wanted us to have better weapons of mathâ€™s instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.“?
Kann ich mich eigentlich noch trauen in die USA zu reisen, obwohl ich mich wohl zur berÃ¼hmt-berÃ¼chtigten Al-Gebra zÃ¤hlen muss? Wem sagen einige der nachfolgenden Namen neben Pythagoras etwas: Thales, L’Hospital, LaPlace, Fourier, Simpson und viele andere? Schon mal darÃ¼ber nachgedacht, dass auch ihr inzwischen von der Al-Gebra infiziert worden seid?